these 15 minutes will end ….

In my last post, I mentioned that my schedule is always a little cattywampus. I do not have a day in and day out routine. I mean, I do try and wake up before anyone else in the house. I do make my french press coffee first thing, empty the dishwasher, make my smoothie, take my supplements and then head upstairs to make the bed, work out and take a shower. But, because I am not sure if I will be in the city or the country, will have an early morning at the office, or can go in a little later, I have taken to watching (and participating with) different exercise peeps on YOUTUBE and working out at home.

More on the exercise videos later….but, one of the experts motivates you throughout your workout by saying things like…”Smile! If you think you are having fun, you will have fun”. And, of course, I smile! 

But, the one thing she says that takes my breathe away is: “these 15 minutes WILL end, but will they end with you giving it your best?”* 

WHOAH.

I’m triggered.

I must say, that for the past few weeks,  give or take, as I was a little under the weather, every time I go to sit down at night, I replay those words in my head “these 15 minutes WILL end” …so, I rethink settling into the sofa and wonder what else I can/should be doing during those 15 minutes…cuz there ain’t no getting them back.

Now, don’t get me wrong, sometimes my thing to get done IS watching an episode of “SUITS” on NETFLIX.  But, it got me to thinking about NO REGRETS/GETTING IT DONE/LIVING LIFE. For me, at this point, life is filled with a fair amount of regret. Sadly. Missed opportunities. Relationships gone sour. Bad choices. 

I am working on myself. I am. How to live with less regret. How to live a larger life. But, what do I mean by larger? Larger has so many nuances to it. My life now is larger and smaller, all at once. And, conversely, my previous life was also large and small at the same time. I moved 5 years ago and made very conscious decisions to help us come together as a family unit. Instead of going to a class after work, for example, I came home to make dinner so we could all be together and eat a healthy meal together. That, in and of itself both made my life larger and smaller all at the same time. Totally worth it. LOVE what I did. Would not change it. LOVE the dinner connection we all have now. BUT, now what?

Let me not get too heady…let me start with not letting time just slip away. Even if it means not letting an evening just slip away.

I am part farm girl and part city girl. So, Spring, Summer and Fall are crazy times. By the time Fall floats around I am beat, and so ready for some down time. Spring through Fall I am building vegetable gardens, building larger flower beds at the farm AND in town. Mulching at both places. WEEDING. Trying to learn how to be an apiarist. Having chickens….all while still working, cleaning and cooking healthy family dinners. 

But Winter….Winter is my nemesis. How to fill my time. My time beyond work. Beyond cleaning and dinners.  Now that the house has a lot fewer people living in it. How to feel useful and large? That is my constant question. 

So, friends, I ask you….how do you spend your evenings? What do you do after dinner and before bed? How do you fill your weekends? What keeps you busy? Stimulated as an individual? Feeling alive as an adult and as a woman.

I am a list maker. Otherwise, I forget things I want to do. Movies I want to see. Books I want to read. So, I need some help. Help me start my “15 minutes WILL end, but will they end with you giving it your best?” list. Tell me your hobbies. Tell me the activities that keep you occupied and alert and loving life. List the books you are reading. List the music you are into. Fill me up. 

Leave your suggestions in the comment box. Maybe we can start something together? 

*@rebeccalouisefitness quote

8 Comments

  1. I try to pay attention to how I spend my time on nights that I’m home since I work some nights but making a more conscious effort is on my goal list this year too. Sometimes those “15 mins” at night are filled with a family show, lately we’ve been into The Masked Singer and Game of Games. Sometimes it’s reading, I love all the scary and twisted thrillers. On the weekends I squeeze in a long run and my ongoing project that leaves me filled up is working on fundraising events for charities that have a piece of my heart ( currently MBS).

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    1. Mel! So impressed with your running..and all the places it is taking you! (Chicago included!!!) I am in love with the fundraising component, especially for MBS. Can you tell me more what exactly you are doing? I wonder what I can do? HMMMMMM Thank you for sharing!

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  2. Usually I do my quilting every evening. It’s relaxing. It’s fulfilling. I do it for myself. I make it for others. I enjoy watching my projects come to life. Monday nights, I save for dancing with the stars or bachelor/-ette. My one reality tv indulgence but rest is quilting or on a rare evening, I go out with friends.

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    1. Marci! Your projects are always stunning! I wish I had the patience to do hand work. I am not sure that I do. Anyone else do handwork? Do you do your projects in a separate project room? If so, do you ever feel isolated?

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  3. Hmm, this is a tough one since slowing down is something I need to make a conscious effort to do more often (dust doesn’t settle on me) . . . but I’m getting better. I’ve freed up most of my weeknights/weekends to be more present with my family. Some of my “free time” is spent on reflection . . . what about my day went well, what didn’t go so well? How did I react to it? Could I have done something differently to make it better? Some time spent on self care (yoga, massage, rest/recharge). LOVE to cook and get creative on ways to make healthier versions of some of my fave foods. Drawing, painting, make stained glass pieces, journal writing – none of which I’ve done in a while (need to find time to get back to these). More often I’m seeking ways to expand my knowledge. Last year that meant getting my AFAA Group Ex and NASM Personal Trainer Certifications, motivated by a local news story about a woman who donated her time to work with seniors using light weights. They all chipped in $1 a session and then donated the $ to a local charity . . . this is what I want to do in my “retirement” years. Finally, Dragonboat and giving back to the community through Dragonheart Vermont 🙂

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